The Ultimatum
by Teal Phoenix
Summary: A difficult choice is placed upon the head of our favorite blond psychopath. Rated T for a little language.


**A/N: Just so I don't get people saying that I used 'Ultimatum' wrong, here's the definition from dictionary(.)com:**

**_Ultimatum (noun)- 1.) A final, uncompromising demand or set of terms issued by a party to a dispute, the rejection of which may lead to a severance of relations or to the use of force.__ 2.) __A final proposal. _**

**Now that that's been cleared up, hello my friends! This popped into my head a little while ago and wouldn't leave, so I typed it up post haste. The second chapter for 'The Franchise' will be up in a week or two, I have homework to do and school to attend just like all other people my age. My time is indeed limited to a few precious hours a day, but it's coming, don't worry. So, on with the story!**

Disclaimer: I own nothing! You hear me you bloody pack of ravenous money-grabbers!? NOTHING!!!!! *cries*

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Marik stared down at the objects in front of him with incredible concentration, little less than an earthquake could shatter his focus. However, the earth itself was wary of this mad yami and thus kept its shifting down to a minimum for the moment. The tanned young man took no notice of the Earth's courtesy, so entranced was he by the task at hand. Of the two small and enticing objects placed in front of him, he was allowed only one by order of Malik and upon pain of castration. He didn't doubt the hikari's promise, he had influenced his good half very little during Battle City. If Malik wouldn't cut his balls off with a rusty knife if he disobeyed, then Marik was a garden gnome, and last he checked he wasn't. And forget about taking both and just stealing more the next day, Malik was hovering nearby, tapping his fingers on the wooden table as Marik studied the objects.

He was looking over a pair of Easter cookies.

Not just any Easter cookies however, no. These were the last two that had been at the local bakery, it was a choice between a rabbit and a carrot shaped cookie. Each with certain qualities that the blond yami desired, the rabbit had a bit of chocolate frosting along with larger size whilst the carrot had sprinkles and much more icing. The bakery had been trying to give everyone a good deal, but it made things immensely more difficult for Marik's selection.

There wasn't much left of Malik's patience and the hikari sighed. "Marik, if you're not going to choose, then I'll pick."

"No!" The yami whirled on him and grabbed his shoulders. "I want the better one! You won't take it from me!" He began forcefully shaking Malik as a small child would a doll in the midst of a temper tantrum. Which was almost the current situating to a tee. "You hear me!? It's mine!!! All mine!!!"

Unbeknownst to the Egyptian duo, the door of the house had cracked open and the large form of Rishid had slipped inside. He took a glance at Marik and Malik fighting and gave a sigh, these sorts of things happened so consistently that not even Rishid was worried by it. The fights had become commonplace and widely accepted in the Ishtar household, neither of the two got hurt as a result, being two parts of the same person tended to have negative effects when pain was involved. It apparently traveled both ways, as Ishizu had found out after whacking Marik over the head with a frying pan for an unspecified crime against cooking then both he _and _Malik had yelped in pain.

In any case, Rishid had entered the abode and had spotted the cookies. He turned over the possibilities in his head and grabbed the rabbit, swiftly taking chunk out of its leg.

The sounds of the fight went silent. And Rishid looked over to see both of the blonds staring at him with unbridled fury in their eyes. Rishid dropped the baked sugar delight and bolted, Marik in hot pursuit screaming something along the lines of, "You bald bastard! Give me that fucking rabbit or I'll cut out your tongue and replace it with a pickle!!"

Malik, on the other hand merely picked up the carrot and reduced it to nothing in a few short bites. It wasn't his fault that his yami was a moron, and if he had to untie Rishid from the tree out back tomorrow morning, then he may as well have some compensation.

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**A/N: And THERE is the oneshot based off of a situation at dinner. Seriously, SAME SITUATION. Except that the cookies were from out of town so there was no way that any of them could be replaced. Luckily for me I was the Malik of the situation, my brother was the Marik and my dad was pretty much Rishid. **

**Anyway, Review please! It only takes a moment. ^^  
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